People Are Dumb

Johnston County Sheriff

Kevin in the Morning’s: People Are Dumb

If There's One Thing We Know, Its People Are Dumb

January 28, 2020

Kevin searches far and wide to find some of the funniest and craziest stories about people who just aren’t thinking as clearly as they should be. They usually get in trouble for what they do and it makes headlines in the news. When that happens, we find the best of the best and bring you a little something we like to call, ‘People Are Dumb’.


In our first story, in Oklahoma City, three people were arrested after allegedly selling PCP, while one of them was impersonating a police officer. Two men and one woman were detained, she was the one pretending to be a police officer. She was allegedly wearing a pink duty belt with pepper spray, two knives, handcuffs, brass knuckles, and a "'special police brass badge." "When officers arrived, she told them also that she was a police officer, and when they asked for her credentials, she couldn't provide them, didn't know what they were and indicated she worked for the armor of faith police department," Which doesn’t exist. Nelson then allegedly told officers, according to the report, that "the father of her children had an armor business and had given her authorization to be a police officer." Ultimately, Nelson was arrested for impersonating an officer and for selling PCP.

In Indio, CA police are on the lookout for a thief who broke into a YMCA through the ceiling. Security footage captured the man kicking through the ductwork in the ceiling of the YMCA Child Development Center. He then drops to the floor to break into a cash register, stealing all the money inside before making a daring escape. There’s only one problem. The cash register at the YMCA Child Development center is fake, its toy, and the money is fake money.

A man experienced instant karma over the weekend in Washington, while his pickup was stolen while he was robbing the business across the street. It was his getaway vehicle and he had left his keys in it, and somebody stole it. So what did he do? He called 911 to report his truck being stolen. But after surveillance video was reviewed police discovered that the reason that he had left his truck, was because he was stealing items from across the street. The owner was then booked in the Benton County Jail for a warrant and a new burglary charge.

Stupid criminals steal a forklift to break into a building and then steal a safe. Two suspects tore a wall using a forklift and used it to drag out a safe and load it into the bed of a pickup truck. The safe was so heavy that it broke off the tailgate. Police were looking for a white Chevy truck. A couple of days later they found it empty by the side of the road and still in the bed of the pickup truck. Using the registration from that truck they were able to track him down the suspects. The suspect denied any involvement in the crime until she found that he was wearing an ankle monitor with a GPS in it. She contacted his probation officer and found out that he was involved in the crime.

A seemingly innocuous post by a woman named Peggy in San Antonio, TX advertised her homemade tortillas on Facebook Marketplace. She included a picture of her kitchen, her tortillas, and the rolling pin covered in flower. As the post began circulating online, people started asking about the weird purple pin. One person said it looked more like a dildo. People started looking at the photo closely, they saw the name “DUREX” on the side of it and everyone realized that it was absolutely a purple dildo. While texting with a buyer, Peggy insisted that the item was actually a vibrating rolling pin - a kitchen gadget not believed to exist. Peggy replied: 'Only an uncultured swine would not see that it's a vibrating rolling pin.'