For all intents and purposes, living in Los Angeles should be as close to the good life as it gets.
The weather’s almost always perfect.
There are beaches and beautiful babes.
There’s nearly legalized marijuana and lots of relaxing vices.
So, what’s the problem?
Who knows, but Los Angeles was deemed one of the most stressful cities in the Nation and here’s some of our theories as to why.
Let’s face it–if you live in Los Angeles, you have to commute. If you drive, and you’re planning to drive across town on the 10, the 405 or the 5 freeways, be ready for an excruciating excursion that will slice minutes, hours, even days off of your expected lifespan. Prepare to rot in your vehicle in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Our sp that Los Angeles drivers spend an hour a day in their cars. If you do math, on an average work week, your drive to work is almost a part-time job. In a city so widespread, traffic is the most necessary evil to life in Los Angeles. The next time you’re stuck on a Los Angeles freeway and find yourself breaking up with your partner, quitting your job, contemplating violence, or daydreaming about driving over the guard rails, try to remember the last time you took the bus. You’ll love your air-conditioned little pod then.
If you can manage to decipher the increasingly-ambiguous parking signs posted throughout Los Angeles as you search for a parking spot, then you probably work for the city. Trying to decode public parking signs while looking for a spot in Downtown, Hollywood, West Hollywood, or just about anywhere in Los Angeles, is a nightmare for Angelenos. By the time you actually find a spot, and you’ve read the sign slowly five times in a row, you’ll most likely only have an hour before you’ve gotta beat it. You can rest assured that you likely will find a parking official circling your car with printer in hand ready slap you up with a violation. As you try to figure out what you missed when you read the sign, you learn that apparently there was some anomalous glitch in the digital meter you paid for and your payment didn’t register.
Coyotes Ate My Chihuahua
Coyotes in Los Angeles are hip to the urban flow. They have adapted to city life and know when we leave for work, come home and walk our pets. These crafty canines are a real threat to our beloved pets and are known to walk right up and down the streets of densely populated neighborhoods and into the drive ways of Angelenos in search of a late night bite. Coyotes are not afraid come right out and snatch small dogs off their leashes as unsuspecting pet owners are left to endure the trauma of seeing their precious pooch dragged away in the mouth of a coyote.
When Landslides Bring You Down
Many of Los Angeles’ affluent residents take refuge high above the hustle and bustle of city life in million dollar properties that precariously grip on to hillsides of throughout Los Angeles. Although it doesn’t happen that often, heavy rainfall in Los Angeles can be a devastating weather condition that sends these homes sliding down onto each other and into roads. Rain isn’t the only culprit, earthquakes have also been known to trigger these destructive landslides. Millions of dollars in property damage and entire lives worth of personal property crashing down hill in a stream of mud and debris is likely to give these Los Angeles homeowners modicum of anxiety every time they feel a drop of rain or a mild tremor.
Roomies for LYFE
With a rental market that continues to elude valid explanation, Angelenos that rent their homes or apartments face continuously souring rental costs. While people in other major U.S. are able to afford to pay their rent, Angelenos with an average income can expect to be sharing their spaces with roommates indefinitely. If there’s anything that stresses renters in Los Angeles out, it’s the reality that they will likely never enjoy the perks of living alone. They may never get to leave their laundry in the washing machine for days or walk around the house naked or take endless showers. Countless Angelenos can probably bank on having roomies for life.
Keepin’ Up With The Joneses
Los Angeles is where celebrities, entertainers, producers, directors, and designers are among the rich and famous residents that keep the best restaurants, parties and events buzzing with excitement. Naturally, those of us who aren’t among the well-to-do residents enjoying a luxurious Los Angeles lifestyle also want in on the action. Some Angelenos will go to great lengths to keep up with appearances. From laser hair removal to tummy tucks, face lifts and nose jobs to pinned ears and surgical implants, some Angelenos spend a great deal of money and time trying to keep up with the Joneses. Due to this obsession with outward superficiality, there’s always a chance that if you drive through any alley in Los Angeles, you may find fake Louis Vuitton handbags being hocked out of the trunk of a luxury car that is just one among a row of luxury vehicles parked outside a shabby run-down apartment building.
Sharing the Road
Chances are, if you live in Los Angeles, you’ve probably slammed your brakes on more than one occasion to avoid smashing into some smug bearded hipster who proudly peddled across four lanes of rush hour traffic, zoomed through the intersection, and waved back at you as he disappeared into the parking lot of a Trader Joe’s. As motorists in Los Angeles learn to “share the road” with bicyclists, they are often challenged by an eager bike rider who gets off on narrowly escaping death and beating the red light. The added stress of hitting one of these guys is only compounded by their faultless status as they generally get away with not having to signal on turns or follow basic traffic laws. But they’re not all daredevils, some cyclists are so cautious that they ride their bicycles in the vehicle lane… at five miles an hour.
The Trader Joe’s Parking Lot
We love Trader Joe’s for their organic produce, tasty samples, free coffee, cheap wine and beer. But, making a run for these goodies means an obscene fist shaking and cussing sesh in your car as you attempt to secure parking in the Trader Joe’s parking lot. These poorly designed parking lots seem like a cruel experiment to test customer loyalty. There is usually only one way in and one way out of these lots and they can only be traversed in one direction. The resulting chaotic pile up of cars is enough to send anyone into a murderous rage.
Did we miss one? Let us know why living in Los Angeles totally stresses you out.