Loquecia Recaps The Jersey Shore 1/06/12: The Crew Returns To Seaside Heights
The Jersey Shore is back, people! But honestly, did it ever really leave? Season 5 premiered last night on MTV, and of course, we ignored it. However, our loyal friend Loquecia still watches this crappy show, and called us to give a recap of what happened last night.
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Season 5 actually starts where season 4 ended, with everyone boarding a plane to leave Italy. Everyone is happy to be home in the US, especially Ronnie, who felt like returning to New Jersey was like “coming back from boarding school to mother”.
A problem arises when it comes to picking rooms back at the house. First, no one wants to room with The Situation, and second, Snooki wants her old bed because “she peed in it last year”. Gross.
The Situation brings back his friend “The Unit” from last season. It’s part of The Situation’s ploy to get people to know that he slept with Snooki. No one cares he slept with Snooki, but that makes The Situation obsess even more about it. As he so eloquently put it,”Hurricane Situation is headed for Snooki Island”. Again, no one cares.
Poor Vinny is depressed. Upset that he can’t be with his family while filming, he considers going home.
Unit my Situation
January 6, 2012 4:43 pm
Loquecia is gettin too big for her itchy britches! You tell that ghetto mama that she should be grateful that Kevin & Bean even care about her uppity rants! Show some respect to the fine Italian-Americans of the Jersey Shore!