Them Crooked Vultures: Album Review

For the most part, music critics can suck it.

Music is subjective. It’s art. It can’t really be judged objectively as if it’s a math problem with a verifiable answer. Plus most critics are cranky, older, balding dudes who use a band’s art to try and prove to the world how intelligent they are, using the biggest, most impressive words they can think of.

So here’s my deal: I think Rage Against the Machine is the best band in the world. I love Foo Fighters. I love Queens of the Stone Age.  I’m not a big fan of the 60’s and 70’s rock. It’s a blind spot I have and I’ve pretty much accepted the fact that I’m wrong on that one. So how do I review Them Crooked Vultures?

Them Crooked Vultures is Dave Grohl on drums and some vocals, Josh Homme from Queens on guitar and lead vocals, and John Paul Jones formerly of Led Zeppelin on bass, and keyboards, and vocals, a bunch of instruments I’ve never heard of,  and everything else.

I put the CD in my car and started listening to the first song called “No One Loves Me and Neither Do I”.  It starts with Dave Grohl, who plays drums with the abandon of Animal from the Muppets. Then Josh’s guitar and singing comes in.  I like it so far. And then 2:45 seconds in (I know because I went back and listened again and again) John Paul Jones, who’s sort of been hiding out until now, literally takes over with a wrecking ball explosion of sound that’s the closest thing to a musical orgasm I’ve ever heard. It’s shockingly great. And the rest of the song is his, with the other two guys along for the ride.  It’s what I love about RATM: the build up and then the explosion that rocks your face off. “ explosion that rocks your face off
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There are 13 songs on the CD, most of which are exactly what you would hope these three musicians would make.  If I had to pick one of the bands it sounds most like, it would be Queens of the Stone Age (“ Songs for the Deaf” that Grohl played on in 2002) because of Josh’s lyrics, singing and guitar.  But it’s not all predictable. There’s “Interlude with ‘ludes” which has layers and layers of echo, and strange guitars, and a mixture of sounds that, to be honest, I couldn’t understand. I think I’ll take another run at that one when I’m high.

“Super groups” always look good on paper, but almost never deliver on the expectations. You hope that the sum is greater than the parts. It almost never is. Audioslave was really good. Velvet Revolver? Really good. I didn’t think either was as good as their potential. It’s the same with sports.  A group of superstars, for the most part, doesn’t beat a group of good players with great chemistry.

Them Crooked Vultures, to me, is a rare exception. They have both great individual talent AND great chemistry.  They deliver on the higher expectations and they really seem to enjoy doing it.

I hope this band continues for a long time. And I hope the Foos and Queens get their leaders back as well, because they’re both great bands in their own right. But if they do, it definitely won’t be because Them Crooked Vultures under-deliver and fizzle out like so many “super groups” before them.

Download the new Them Crooked Vultures album right now for $6.99 at ShockHound